B12 Shots | 25 Days of Me

I posted this earlier this year but I felt it needed to be shared again. It explains my fear of needles and I did do a little update at the end as to how this has been going after most of the year.

I’m that weirdo who dances around before checking her blood sugar. I can’t explain why all of this happens either. Needles freak me out in ways you cannot imagine. Trypanophobia is the extreme fear of needles and I guess that is what I have. I used to pass out the minute the doctor pulled one out. that pretty much did in my dreams of being a doctor. 

Then I had to start checking my blood sugar and you would think that would help but it really didn’t. When I got sick and had to have so many tests and procedures done I stopped passing out after the first couple of months. Then it got to where I could manage it as long as I wasn’t looking at them.

Recently though I discovered my B12 was pretty much non-existent and I would have to take shots. You read that correctly! It’s fairly simple: you take one shot a week for four weeks and then once a month. You can even give them to yourself. So the first four weeks every week my caregiver in an effort to help me do things for myself drew the medicine from the vial and then had me give myself the shot in my thigh. 

Every week for four weeks I cried for twenty minutes before I stuck the needle into my thigh. Now, look my caregiver could have given me the shot, I could have asked her to do it. However, she made a valid point. I need to learn to do things for myself or recovery won’t happen. I will be in the chair and stuck depending on others to do for me for the unforeseeable future. It is not something I want. So if I have to cry for twenty minutes every single time before I can give myself the shot I will. Did I mention that these shots hurt? They do and I have asked others who take them if they hurt them as well. Guess what some have said they do while others say they don’t. My leg is sore afterwards for about a day as well.

December Update

It hasn’t gotten any easier giving these to myself. I don’t cry as much but it still takes me 20 minutes to work up the courage. Although I will admit the wonderful people at my local pharmacy will do it for me. They have been kind enough to do it a few times when I just couldn’t work up the courage to do it.

Again, I know this seems like a dumb hill to die on, so to speak, but it my hill and one I can’t seem to conquer. Although I have gotten better about a lot of it. It used to be I would pass out whenever I got a shot or had blood drawn. They would pull out the needle and I would hit the floor. I don’t do that anymore. Although I will admit that during COVID those masks gave me a way to easily hide my eyes.

Do you take B12 shots? How are they going for you? Do you have an irrational fear?