How to Speak Like An Elegant Woman

I admit that I don’t speak as eloquently as I could. I did learn how to speak and act like a lady, thanks to my grandmother, who felt that all of us girls needed to learn to be ladies. I can curtesy with the best of them when I need to. Not that I have needed to do that much in my life. I also know when not to say anything, but rather to just keep my mouth shut.

Again, this doesn’t happen often anymore. I can be polite when I really don’t want to be, and you may never know when I don’t like you. Those airs and graces are something I have struggled with when it comes to my own children. I would like my daughters to know how to speak like elegant ladies, but how much is too much? Here are a couple of tips I have thought of if you want to speak more elegantly.

Grace and Manners

That thing I mentioned about knowing when to speak?It is the most important thing. When you need to say something and when you need to just keep it to yourself. I know it is hard. especially in this day and age. Another part of it is to always be polite. Again, this is easier, but being polite will sometimes get you further than being mean. I will say it can also get you a visit from the social worker because the nurse assumes you are depressed. When all you really are is being polite and putting your book down when she enters the room to give her your attention. 

Don’t Impress

When an elegant woman speaks, she isn’t trying to impress anyone, even if she secretly is. She doesn’t point out anyone’s flaws or be mean. She speaks with kindness and, if needed, simply states her case. She never gets into a public argument because it would embarrass others. I admit, this was a difficult one for me to learn. My daddy used to say I would argue with a wall if I could. My grandmother lamented that I would never find a husband because I was so agrumentive. 

Expand your vocabulary

Expand your vocabulary by reading more. When you read a variety of books, you see how the words are used and spelt. It helps you not only learn those you don’t know but keeps your memory refreshed with common words and sayings that you no longer use much. Remember, though, that you are learning new words, not trying to sound better than someone else.

Stop the slang and cursing

Yeah, this one is really hard for me. I will say though, I didn’t curse like I do or use as much slang before my father died. In fact, it wasn’t until after I got married that my language got this bad. Ladies don’t curse though, and if you are trying to sound elegant, you are going to have to drop it. Not to mention, an elegant woman would never dream of using slang in her life. Maybe save those for when you are around family and friends whom you don’t have to make a good impression on.

Think Before You Speak

Not thinking through what you are about to say before saying it is not something an elegant woman does. Taking a moment to consider what you want to say and how you want to say it will make you sound not only more elegant but also more intelligent. When you think before you speak, you use fewer slang or cuss words. Your message comes out clearly and concisly. You sound as though you know what you are talking about. You sound confident, and people will not only notice but listen to you more.

As I said, learning to be a lady was not the easiest part of growing up for us girls. I guess my grandmother had hoped we would marry Lords or something. Boy, was she disappointed. I hope that I am assisting my daughters in becoming ladies without impeding them in any way. I have no expectation of grand marriages for them. I just want them to know how to speak and act properly.