Last year I reviewed Yelling: The Cause, The Casualty, & The Cure by Lorrie Felm and learned a lot. This year the Gabby Moms are revisiting that very book and I reread it with fresh new eyes and wanted to share with you all how I have been doing with my yelling. In the book Lorrie gives great tips on how to overcome the devastating choice of yelling (which I am guilty of.) Lorrie knows what she is talking about because she is a former yeller and is able to sympathize with the reasons that I yell while encouraging me to change. She doesn’t make me feel like I am a terrible mom because I fell into the pattern of my own childhood. She even gave me some ideas on how to beat my trigger points and pointed out the causes of yelling. Lorrie also discusses the effects of yelling on children but I will tell you that as a child of yelling I already knew those. It was simply a hard habit to break.
Last year I discovered that Lorrie’s child training cause was the one cause that seemed to be me all the way. I either want my children to behave properly so I come down on every single thing they do or say OR I try to be the fun mom and let them get away with murder. After reading all of the book I decided I would sit them down and make sure they understand the basics rules we have and then stick with being serious about those and not worry so much about all the other small stuff. Lorrie’s tips have allowed me to notice the change in myself and I began to take a moment and calm down before I start the yelling.
My children began to notice the change in me right away and I am happy to report that I do not yell as often now as I did a year ago. I take the time to calm down and then talk things over with my children.This has also led me to change how I interact with my husband as well. I no longer fly off the handle when we argue, instead I react as calmly as possible (95% of the time) and we resolve our issue. So THANK YOU to Eternal Encouragement for providing a copy of this e-book.own
Here’s a little something for you….. On July 24th ONLY you can get your very copy of Yelling: The Cause, The Casualty, & the Cure for FREE!!! That’s right free 1 day only! All you need to do is click the book name. Enjoy!
I received a complimentary copy of Yelling, The Cause, The Casualty, & The Cure as part of The Gabby Moms program in exchange for my honest review.
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As a recovered yeller, I can appreciate so much of what you wrote. One thing that was key for me to remember in the early stages of trying not to yell was that as soon as I yelled, I lost my power. From that moment on, my son was the one who was in control.
What confuses me now is how he perceives that I “yelled at him”. If I say anything from a place of authority/correction/reprimand (even in the tiniest of voices), his perception is I yelled at him. I haven’t yelled at him for years…so I don’t know why he might still say that unless it’s a general immaturity toward the weight the correct words carry.
i grew up in home with a rage-a-holic, yelling breaking physical abuse to an extreme. every one argued, fighting. i was the peace-keeper, and when i got older and moved out i lived different – quiet. i keep my music low, tv volume at normal level and no yelling.
i have a service dog, she is my fur-child, and has grown up in a peaceful home.
if she hears raised voices she barks aggressively! And everyone stops. i will not let her stay in an environment like that. i have actually left in a car, so she wont hear it.
i love her so much