You all know that I am my mother’s caregiver. That sounds so bad when I say it that way but for lack of another word that is what I am. I am lucky in that mother can get around pretty well and manage most things on her own. It’s all the things that she can’t manage that sometimes can be a huge pressure. What no one tells you when you become the caregiver of your parent is just how much it is like raising a child, only ten times harder. They are stubborn in ways that a child could never be and so set in their ways.
I CAN HEAR
This is a big one in our home. My mother refuses to go get her hearing checked. She is adamant that she can hear just fine. she can’t! I was practicality screaming at her recently and she didn’t hear a single word I said. I was in her face and she didn’t hear me. I wish there was a place here like thehearingroom.ca/ because I think she would feel comfortable with them. I have her an appointment but I am planning a sneak attack to get her there. You know tell we are going out to lunch and then surprise!
I DON’T EAT THAT
This comes from my uncle more than my mother. However, I came home from vacation to discover that the only vegetables that had been made were by the caregiver I brought in a few days a week. How is that possible? At some point they ate vegetables. I know because my mother made us eat vegetables and they both tell stories of having to eat them when there was little money for meat. Yet, they refuse now. I have resorted to some underhanded things to get vegetables in them.
BABYSITTER!
When I was gone during the summer I hired someone to come in a few days a week to make sure my mother and uncle were managing. You taking their medications, checking blood sugar, etc. Just someone to do a few of the things I do every day. I just went online and searched a place like this website to find someone qualified. You would have thought I took their candy away. For two weeks my mother yelled at me about how much she didn’t need a babysitter.
WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?
I have said that to my mother more than to my kids. I am not kidding. I will come out some mornings and she has been walking in her dang housecoat. Housecoat, people! Like it is a big deal. She also has her nightgown under it tucked into some sweats. I can’t even some days. Now, realize that we live out int he country but there is a line that has to drawn somewhere. Although I am sure that my mother would cross it.
SO MUCH MORE
There are so many other things that I could tell you makes it difficult. It isn’t all bad and I love that I am able to do it. I just wish at times that my mother remembered she was the mother and I was the child. There are days when I want to run screaming from the house. However, the alternative is not one that I would consider unless I had no other choice. A choice that I pray I never have to make.